A few days before the trip, my daughter flew in from New York. I had set myself a small (but not insignificant) goal: to finally complete an online course in Tibetan Buddhism – shorter than War and Peace, but still not exactly comic-strip reading. Now, a confession: this was not my first attempt. I had enrolled twice forthe year-long program. Dropped out both times. Tried the six-month version. Dropped out again. Even roped in friends for moral support. Still didn\u2019t happen.This time, though, I signed up for a four-month version. And\u2014I can hardly believe I\u2019m typing this\u2014I completed it. Even sat for the final test. And passed! Fifth attempt. Cue the confetti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So what was di\ufb00erent? The syllabus hadn\u2019t changed. The monks were still monks. The content was still deep. The difference was Sandeep.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Power of a Role Model<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Sandeep was one of my fellow study partners. Unlike me (who thrives on bursts of enthusiasm and multiple half-finished projects), he has the gift of execution. Pick a task, stay with it, complete it. Quietly, diligently, humbly. While the rest of us scrambled to catch up, Sandeep was always ahead\u2014consistently sharing his neatly summarized notes, reminding us what \u201cdiscipline\u201d looks like in real life. When he announced he\u2019d finished the program and passed the exam, I felt an unmistakable kick in the backside. \u201cIf he can do it, Sanjay, so can you.\u201d That push got me over the finish line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Snorkeling at Dawn<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n This theme of learning from others carried into the Maldives trip itself. We went with another family this time, and our friend Sumit became the invisible choreographer of our days. Sumit is one of those maddeningly energetic people who thinks 6 a.m. is a great time to start life. Because of him, our schedule looked like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n Snorkeling between 7:00 and 8:30 am.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Breakfast.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Midday games and volleyball.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Afternoon snorkeling again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n More games.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Lights out by 9:00 p.m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Compare this to our usual family pattern: leisurely mornings, one activity (two if ambitious), late nights. Left to ourselves, we would never have packed in so much living. But following Sumit\u2019s rhythm, I experienced the Maldives in a whole new way. Even my wife and daughter\u2014normally less gung-ho about physical exertion than I am\u2014were swept into this current of activity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Role models at work again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Lessons from Bharatanatyam<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n This idea isn\u2019t new. I see it in my daughter\u2019s Bharatanatyam classes. The teacher has students ranging from five to twenty-five, sometimes older. The younger ones watch the seniors with wide eyes, copying gestures and stamina. The seniors, in turn, are sharpened by the responsibility of being observed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Everyone benefits. The \u201clocal maxima\u201d\u2014those who are just a little further along\u2014become sources of inspiration. And then the torch keeps moving.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A Mathematical Aside (Humor Me)<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Mathematicians have a phrase: local maxima. A point that is higher than its immediate neighbors, though not necessarily the highest in the universe. Imagine a group of people averaging 4\u00bd feet in height. A person who\u2019s 5\u20194\u201d is their local maxima. They may not be the tallest player on the basketball court, but in that group, they stand tall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That\u2019s what I mean: find your local maxima. Not superhuman paragons. Not perfect icons. Just someone in your circle who embodies a quality you want to grow into\u2014discipline, generosity, non-judgment, creativity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Coming Home with a New Lens<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Back from the trip, I made a list of the people I spend the most time with and noted what each was particularly good at. One friend is a tireless giver. Another, deeply non-judgmental. A third can connect with anyone, anywhere. A fourth radiates discipline.Then I asked myself: which of these qualities do I most want to cultivate this year?<\/p>\n\n\n\n The answers came clear:<\/p>\n\n\n\n 1. Be more of a giver.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 2. Be less judgmental.<\/p>\n\n\n\n So I\u2019ve set myself a small experiment: spend more time with these particular friends, observe how they live these values, talk to them about it. Let their strengths rub o\ufb00 on me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Why This Matters for Artists<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If you\u2019re a dancer, a musician, a painter\u2014you know this instinctively. You grow not just by practicing alone in a room, but by placing yourself among others whose artistry stretches you. By watching someone take a raga or a jati or a brushstroke a little further than you\u2019ve gone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Inspiration isn\u2019t abstract. It\u2019s embodied. And often, it\u2019s not about finding \u201cthe best in the world.\u201d It\u2019s about finding the best in your world, right now. Your local maxima. <\/strong>Cultivate them. Learn from them. Let them quietly reshape you. Because whether it\u2019s completing a stubborn online course, snorkeling at dawn, or dancing until your anklets sing\u2014sometimes the surest way to grow is simply to stand near someone who already has.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And maybe that\u2019s the gift of long friendships too, like mine with Anita. People who\u2019ve walked beside you for decades, trusted you through your unfinished drafts and your half-baked ideas, and believed something worthwhile would eventually emerge. More often than not\u2014they\u2019re right.<\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" By Sanjay Rao Chaganti<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":171391954,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-171391953","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-essays"],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/171391953","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=171391953"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/171391953\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":171391956,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/171391953\/revisions\/171391956"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/171391954"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=171391953"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=171391953"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=171391953"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}![\"\"](\"https:\/\/mediamax.design\/gia\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/cultivating-essays-2-823x1024.jpg\")